Ladies and gentlemen, it has come to my attention that some people (men) may have been offended by my butthole joke. If any of my jokes have offended you, I apologize. I typically write from my own (female) perspective, so sometimes I may not have realized that I may have crossed the line and offended others. I will make an effort to empower both women and men to let their freak flags fly. Instead of judging men, I will share constructive criticism to help men connect and develop intimacy with their female counterparts.
In an effort to help you all get your freak on, I have included a link to an article by Refinery29 in Honor of National Sex Toy Day (11/4/2019).
For those who were intrigued by the butthole joke, I included a post by Dame, “A Beginners Guide to Butt Plugs”.
There are always dating coaches telling women to do this or that to get or keep a man. Not here. Men…the spotlight is on you. Don’t fret. I am here to help. Hopefully, this will be an upgrade from The Game by Neil Strauss. I feel men have objectified women for long enough. Now it is time for the for reckoning. I have included a list of dating/ intimacy tips for men…by a woman…
- Let’s start with communication. – Be direct and honest. Say what you mean and mean what you say. If you want some freaky shit, it’s all good. Let your woman know. Discuss it and make sure you have her consent. She needs to explicitly say, “Yes, I agree to this. Let’s give it a try.” Please don’t try to coerce or force anyone, male or female, to do anything they are not comfortable with. That is not ok! That is the opposite of consent! Imagine a woman shoving a dildo up your ass without your permission. Not Cool! So, don’t do it either!
- Teamwork makes the dream work. There is no “I” in team. Prepare to compromise and be there for your teammate. It’s not all about you. Eat the pussy before asking for a blowjob. Better yet, 69.
- Show up in your relationship. Support your partner emotionally. Just because you can make it rain or drizzle, does not mean you can opt out of being emotionally available.
- Work on yourself, too! No one is prefect. Many people cope with childhood trauma and negative past relationships, but your partner cannot be your mother or 24/7 therapist. Feel free to seek professional help. I understand that there is stigma regarding seeking mental health or substance use treatment, but it is difficult to be emotionally present in your relationship, if you are struggling. Take the first step and seek help, if you need it. You cannot dump everything on your partner. She deals with enough already. However, your partner may be there to support you, listen to you vent, and may even attend your counseling sessions with you. For instance, a friend shared a story on how her partner refuses to eat dinner without her, even though she works very late into the evening. She explained that there would be a cooked meal on the stove or in the fridge, and her partner refuses to eat, unless she is home to specifically serve him his food on a tray. When I heard this, I immediately said, have you done counseling? Something sounds very off about this situation. Ladies and gentlemen, I cannot imagine working a 8 -10 hour work day to come home and serve a grown, able-bodied man who refuses to eat and sometimes goes to bed hungry because I am not home in time to prepare his plate. Men, that behavior is NOT ok! My friend suggested counseling to her partner, but this man would rather continue to go to bed hungry than to speak to professional about the deeper issues that may be at play. My friend is a very, very patient woman. If that man was my partner, I would be like… I love you, but you need help. Get it or continue to have your stomach growling. I eat when I am not home with you, and you should too!
- Wash your ass! Looking and smelling good is essential. Women spend money and time on their beauty routine. You should give it a try, too! If you want your girl to toss your salad, it better be clean. Nothing ruins the mood faster than dry shit stuck between a grown man’s ass. No one wants to see, smell, or taste that.
- Show appreciation. You don’t have to buy your partner a new car, so show her you care. Sometimes giving your partner a massage or preparing a luxurious bath for her can be a good start. Heck, it may even lead to some freaky nasty time.
That is all I have for now. Share your thoughts about the list.
Please feel free to add to this list in the comments below. Thank you for reading!